July 5th, 2006

(no subject)

My best friend told me about this happening to her at school. She and this other girl were sitting in desks across the row from each other with their bags and binders in between. My friend had a binder with a picture of Heath Ledger on it, which the girl noticed, causing her to blab incessantly about how hot Heath Ledger is and on and on. My friend just nodded occasionally and pretty much ignored her. Until...

Girl: "You're gay!"
Friend: "What?"
Girl: "You're gay! I'm gay too!"
Friend: "Um, no, I'm not gay."
Girl: "Yes you are. You like men therefore you are gay, and so am I!"
Friend: "Umm... no. That makes us heterosexuals."
Girl: "Oh ew gross! I am not! How dare you say I am! That's disgusting!"
Friend: O_o

My friend had to explain to this idiot girl what a heterosexual was. And if that wasn't bad enough, she then had to explain to ANOTHER idiot girl what bi-sexual meant. I wouldn't have had the patience. I would have wacked them over the head with a book.
simm young sexy

First mock

Reading the confusion about Brazil and whether or not it's located in CHINA or GERMANY, I was reminded of something that happened to me outside Borders bookstore yesterday.

I was walking in when a woman walked in, telling her daughter, "Yeah, China is one of those Japanese countries."

To be fair...they DID invade them...but seriously O.o.
poke

Remembered stupidity (mine)

This post reminded me of something I did way back in junior high.

I have always had pets growing up - cats and dogs. And, like everyone else, every once in a while I want to give one of those pets attention - petting or brushing or whatever. So I would snap my fingers and maybe make the kissy noises at them to get them to come running (the dogs anyway - cat's don't usually do this).

Well one day my best friend was spending the night. We were camped out in the living room watching TV, and I wanted to get her attention for some reason. So instead of just saying her name or whatever, I reach out, snap my fingers, and start making kissy noises.

I realized what happened a minute or so later, and felt like a total idiot. She was engrossed in the TV, so I don't think she noticed.
  • Current Mood
    embarrassed embarrassed

(no subject)

Up here in Toledo, Ohio, we've been declared a "disaster area" in a state of emergency due to massive flooding from a freak storm we had a few weeks back.

My best friend is a tow-truck driver, and was called out to many scenes to tow cars caught in viaducts, flooded streets, etc.

All prime sights of amusement, LOTS of "OMG I DI'INT KNOOO IT WAS FLOOOOODED" (even thought all of the radio and local TV stations were broadcasting to STAY OFF the streets). But many hours into the ordeal, he gets this gem:

Friend: "Um, so you tried to drive your Civic through standing water?"
Stupid Person: "No. I didn't. I guess I didn't see it.
(pause)
Stupid Person: "When I did, it was too late."
(pause)
Stupid Person: "So I hit my gas and SPED through it!"

Well, obviously, creating a huge wall of water in front of you (quickly), and flooding your engine is going to get that tiny little car through the HUGE flood of standing water that you just didn't see! LOGIC!!

*headdesk*
  • Current Mood
    calm calm