April 5th, 2006

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In one of the French classes at school, everyone had to do a report on a country with a good amount of French speakers. People who don't already have a favorite French-speaking country are going through guidebooks to find one interesting enough to write about.

One girl, lazily flipping through a book with plenty of pictures, raises her hand, "Do they speak French a lot in Tibet?"

Several people look at her oddly. "No," one says disparagingly.

"What? So I don't know much geography. It's not like it's a big deal," the idiot-girl says, and continues to flip through the book.

A few moments later, she asks, "How about England?"
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Do Not Feed The Artichoke

Here's a memory from high school. In my junior year, I was taking Algebra II with about 15 senior girls. When we were working on permutations, our teacher gave us a worksheet he wrote up himself. This is significant because, while the problems were on the familiar subject of calculating topping combinations for certain types of pizza, he chose interesting toppings such as tofu, sun-dried tomatoes, and marinated artichoke hearts.

Most everyone got the first few problems right, but later the girls were coming up with numbers a bit too big or a bit too short compared to the solutions my teacher and I got. Incidentally, these problems were the meat-only combinations and the veggie-only combinations. Apparently, the whole lot of them thought an artichoke was some sort of animal. After our teacher informed them that artichokes counted as vegetables, a few of them protested that he shouldn't have put the word "heart" next to it.

Now, I know that where I live artichokes aren't exactly common, but isn't 17 or 18 roughly old enough to know that "heart" can mean more than an organ in an animal? Or that some not-meat foods have body part names, such as lady fingers?

What truly frightens me is that these girls have bred.

Edited to add: I said before that artichokes aren't exactly common, but those girls don't even have that to their credit anymore. I went shopping at Wal-Mart the other day and saw artichokes clearly displayed in the vegetable section. A few of those girls really should have known better because of this, considering that some of them worked at that Wal-Mart.