March 15th, 2006

Pirate

(no subject)

Last week I was standing on a beach with a friend. For whatever reason his eardrum popped and he looked at me and asked how high I thought we were above sea level. "About three inches" I replied.
Chrisjen - Red Snow

Work shenanigans

As well as servicing customers in a phone centre, I also do minor work with computers at work. So yesterday, I set up the email for one of the girls who had moved into another department. She was settling in quite happily when I stepped out of the room for a minute, but was frowning when I returned.

M: me
A: the girl

M: What's wrong A?
A: It's not playing my cd! What's wrong?!?!

I open the cd tray and peer inside. There was the cd . . . . UPSIDE DOWN.

M: . . . It's upside down. o_O
A: . . . . . Ooops.


*headdesk*
  • Current Mood
    amused amused

(no subject)

This one managed to get past me before it registered what was said.

I was playing a (very loud WW2) game and listening to some (very loud) music on my headphones when I somehow manage to hear someone banging my bedroom door.

I take off my headphones, yell something along the lines of "whaaaaat?!" through the door (as this is my designated me-time, and I am not usually disturbed-- hence my rudeness).

Mom: What are you doing in there? I've been yelling for you forever!
Me: I'm just listening to music, I've got my headphones on, sorry.
Mom: Well next time take off your headphones when I'm calling you.

Now.. I can kinda, sorta understand it. But, how am I supposed to know she's calling me, so that I can take my headphones off?
  • Current Music
    sally gal - bob dylan
Teaching Education (chrisandJoey)

Roller Coaster Challenge

I teach Science in a pretty rough secondary school in England and today we ran a roller coaster challenge - making a marble roller coaster out of paper, masking tape and pipe lagging.

To win the grand prize the kids had to write an 800-word essay about the physics of the roller coaster.

What we got from the foundation group boys was an 800-word sentence. No stopping. One long sentence.

Every now and again the word arse was inserted. (The British version of ass)

I couldn't work this out, had someone deliberately put in curse words.

Eventually I worked it out.



In my area they say OURS with an A sound at the beginning - arrr-z.

The kids had spelt this phonetically as arse.

Me, the Head of Science, the acting Head of English, the Principal and the visiting Vicar, we all mocked the stupid :)
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Goldie Hawn

(no subject)

I go to school with one of those horny, cocky guys who surprise most of us regular folk by making it through kindergarten. I thought these people only existed on sitcoms until I changed to this school, and ever since, the guy I like to call Manwhore has been a favourite topic of discussion to mock among my friends and I. Since about the beginning of the semester, I have been writing all the stupid things I could remember Manwhore saying on the back of my math notebook (what? It's not like I use it for math). They are more or less in consecutive order. Oh, and just to give you an idea of what he's like, he's pretty much the same as Zapp Brannigan on Futurama or The Todd on Scrubs.

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  • Current Music
    The Strokes - First Impressions of Earth
01 wassap

Sinbad

A while back, my family and I were watching a cooking show in which a chef was making spinach pie. This is the conversation that ensued:

    Brother: Uh oh, she'd better keep that away from Sinbad.
    Me: Who's Sinbad?
    Mum: You know; Sinbad and the Forty Thieves.
    Me: That's Ali Baba!
    Mum: Oh yeah.
    Me: Who's Sinbad?
    Brother: You know, he eats spinach and goes 'AARRRRRRRRRRR!' ... Oh wait, that's Pop-Eye.


Combined stupidity is a rarity in my family.
  • Current Music
    Nuttin'