February 21st, 2006

calm, sunflowers

(no subject)

Last week in one of my classes we took an exam. 100 questions, had 1 hour and 15 minutes to complete it. Today we got the results back. The class average was 30-something, which apparently is the worst set of grades the professor has ever seen in her ten years of teaching.

Not only is she greatly disappointed in our grades, but she's also greatly disappointed in our academic integrity. According to her class everage printouts, nearly everyone got the same questions wrong, and had put the same wrong answer. This could not be tolerated. If this were to happen again she will bring the entire class under academic investigation. For our next exam she does not want a repeat scene.

She wouldn't have to go through all this if she hadn't given us a 100-question True/False exam in the first place.
MOOOO!

Recurring Stupidity

Recurring Stupidity is when everyone you work with has a general disregard for various signs.

Background: My department is located at the end of the corridor. There's my office, my boss's office and a conference room. My office has a big white sign on it with my name and how I'm in charge of all queries concerning the conference room. If there is a meeting in the conference room, a big wooden podium with a sign stating, "Meeting in Progress" is put right in front of the door so that you can't get in without moving it.

Why, oh why must people come down the corridor, look at the "Meeting in Progress" sign, look at my sign, stare at me, then ask, "Is there really a meeting in progress????"

Yes, and while I'm glad you have the ability to read, I wish your comprehension was a bit better. That's what I would like to say, but instead I tell them that yes, there really is a meeting in progress and to come back at a later time.

What's worse are the ones that come down the corridor, look at the "Meeting in Progress" sign, look at my sign, stare at me, and then move the podium sign and just barge right into the meeting anyways without checking with me first. This is quickly followed by me flying out my office to try and stop them, and them scurrying out of the room ten seconds later with a sheepish look on their faces.

The regular conversation go like this:

Me: "Sir, can I help you with something?"
Stupid: "Oh, I wanted to see the conference room, but I didn't realize there's a meeting in there."
Me: "Yes sir, that's why we have the sign out in front of the door."
Stupid: "Yes, I saw the sign, but I didn't think that there was a meeting in progress right now."
Me: "Well in the future, if you have in questions please ask me," *I point to my office and sign*, "and I can tell you if there really is a meeting in progress, okay?"
Stupid: "Thanks." *Scurries off to bug someone else.*

It wouldn't be so bad if this was a one off, but unfortunately the stupids just keep coming and pulling this routine a couple times a week.
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anna and joe

(no subject)

I just came back from Philosophy class...where I heard the strangest argument about why people obviously believe in God.

Disclaimer: this isn't meant to offend anyone...just the nature of the argument made me almost say 'wtf' out loud...

We were discussing Anselm and Aquinas today...both have arguments for the existence of God. And Dennis decided that he wanted to participate in discussion. He's probably wishing that he hadn't.

Dennis: I believe that everyone has to believe in God.
Dr. Spence: ...atheists??
Dennis: No, everyone believes in God, even just a little bit.
Me: *thinking that he must have missed the memo that says Atheist don't believe in God.*
Dennis: Everyone believes in God. If they didn't why would they use money that has "In God we trust" printed on it?
Dr. Spence: uh, because they have no choice...are they supposed to barter for the groceries at the counter?
Dennis: well, if they don't believe in God, then yes
*Everyone stares and then laughs*

Dr. Spence pretty much told him that he really was making no sense...which is true. I sit behind him and the whole time I just kind of stared at the back of his head, thinking, what is wrong with him?

This is also the kid who was wearing a pin in his ear as an earring last week. Like a pin the size of a nickel, of our school's mascot...in his ear.
No Country - So Close

(no subject)

A friend of mine, her father, and I went out to lunch in a cafe several years back. Jane (my friend) had been talking about how she hated anything strawberry-flavored aside from actual strawberries. I had said that I agreed, but that Strawberry Kool-Aid was tolerable, which lead to the following gem of discussion:

Jane: Eww! I hate Kool-Aid!
Me: *confused* ...Why?
Jane: Are you kidding? It's so sour!
Me: Well, then you probably just aren't putting in enough sugar. You put in a cup of it, don't you?
Jane: But if you put in that much, you won't even be able to taste the flavoring!
Me: ...Not if you stir it.
Jane: Stir? What good would that do?
Me: *blinks in disbelief* It makes the flavoring and sugar mix in with the water and dissolve...
Jane: ...Water?! Since when do you add water to it? *looks to father*
Father: Really? I've never heard of that. Where does it say that?
Me: *does double take* In the directions printed on the back of every single packet...

Yes, ladies and gentleman, neither she nor her 40+ year old father were aware that you were supposed to add Kool-Aid to water. Apparently the facts that it's sold in the juice aisle and that the "mascot" for it is a pitcher of liquid didn't ever tip them off. The mind boggles.

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horse

My Former Roommate

My roommate's name was Debbie. The girl was not very bright but she somehow miraculously ended up in college, and as my roommate. On one of the first days of the semester she's sitting next to me with her brand new TI-83+ (aka a very expensive calculator) and proceeded to ask me.

"How do you put 8% in the calculator?" So i humor her and show her how to put it into the calculator. No less than 5 minutes later she asks "How do I put 12.5% into my calculator?" I was wondering if the .5 threw her off.

Once while my boyfriend was over. She barges into the room and screams "There isn't a place called Vietnam!" Me and my boyfriend tried to convince her that there was a war there, and that it's in Asia. She wouldn't believe us though. So we both looked at eachother, and went to my computer to show her the Vietnam was indeed a place. When we brought up the map she points and jumps up and down saying "Oh my god! It's Thailand AND CHINA TOO!!!"

There were many times this girl got drunk, about 3-4 nights a week she would get drunk. I have nothing against people getting drunk, but she did it too often, and i needed to study. When she was drunk she would unlock the door and then kick it in. As a result my door doesn't close anymore.

Debbie is a Horticulture major who doesn't like getting dirty. This doesn't make sense because she has to work with plants, and dirt. There were a few times she had to go and work in the garden and she either wore white or a pastel color. Then as a result she had to do wash. She needed me to help her do wash step by step. From seperating colors and whites, to how t put detergent in. Then I had to go through the drying cycle with her as well. Then first time around helping her with it i was fine. Then when she asked me a second time to help her, I agreed. Finally I gave up with trying to help her, because she did so much wash so often.

Finally the girl lived 20 minutes from campus, and sent her clothes home twice a week to get her clothes cleaned by her mom. She decided to push someone else out of housing when she could have been a commuter here, and saved me the misery of living with her.

I only had to live with her for 5 months, I just kicked her out of the room! There are many other various stupid things she has done, but i have blocked these memories
cute hat
  • opalcat

DO NOT DELETE OTHER PEOPLE'S COMMENTS

This is a bannable offense. If you have a problem with a comment, tell me about it. Do NOT delete other people's comments to your posts.

Edited to add: There was no drama, sorry to disappoint. Just someone's comment went missing and I know *I* didn't delete it, so I figured I'd remind people of the rule.
nevermore

(no subject)

So, today my friends and I were talking about the health class that we'd taken a few years ago and eventually we got the subject of organ donations. That's when I was gifted with this:

Friend #1: Yeah, my grandfather donated his eyes.
Friend #2: Oh my God! Was he dead?!

I should hope so!
Love

(no subject)

So, today was TAKS, the Texas Assessment of Knowledge and Skills. In the front of the class is a board with the regular rules during testing, stuff like no water at desks, backpacks at front of room, etc. But one started the stupidness...

4.Turn off all telecommunications devices

So, this kid John doesn't understand.

John:Did you make up that word: telecommunication? I don't think that's a real word

Teacher:*mentalheaddesk*Yes, it is a real word.

By itself, this would be great as its own entry. But it gets better.

John:Is that like one of those watches that go off every hour? Cuz it should be!

Entire class:*headdesk*

Not encouraging when he's about to take a tesk guaging his mastery of English and Language skills.
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