Yesterday on the bus I overheard a conversation that made my toenails curl. The girls in question were about 16 years old.
Stupid 1: So... if a woman sleeps with two different men she will have twins?
Stupid 2 (a bit unsure): Yeah... I guess so. But then, how is she supposed to know which man is the father of which baby?
me: *open-mouthed blank stare*
I made guacamole for the second time not long ago. The first time did not work out so well, but this time it was good. The boyfriend was talking to a co-worker about this and managed to spit out these gems:
bf: "So, the first time Holly made guacamole it was awful! I guess it was because the guacamolies weren't ripe"
His co-worker stares at him...
bf: "What? Is it guacamoli?"
sigh. No honey, they're called avocados.
This was short of 2 years ago, on my 8th grade's graduation field-trip to Atlanta. We were at the baseball field there... The really big one... It was a 'perfect game' that time? Or something. I really know nothing about sports. X__X Anyway, there was a 'Kosher concession stand' there, and I was at a Jewish school, so that was the only place the teachers wanted us buying from. So, a few of us look at the menu up on the top of the stand.
Ham and cheese sandwhiches.
Jeremy, one of my classmates: Uh, excuse me, this is supposed to be Kosher food, right?
Snackbar guy: Yes sir, it is.
Jeremy: But, you have ham and cheese on the menu. >.>;
Snackbar guy: Yes, so?
Jeremy: Ham and cheese isn't kosher.
Snackbar guy: Sure it is, it's on rye bread.
...Ah, hahahahahahhahah... .__.;;
My sister has got a friend who is very sweet, but alas, she is an air-head, and says the darndest things without really thinking first. Today was one of those days.
[My sister and two of her friends, the air-head being one of them, are walking home.]
Friend: Wow, there sure lives a lot of people in [this suburb to Stockholm in which we live].
Friend: Maybe even 50,000 people live here.
Air-head: *starts laughing* What, you really believe that?
Friend: *surprised* Yeah, why is that so impossible?
Air-head: *still laughing* 50,000 is like... half a million!
And she's got top grades in Math. Sigh.